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Faithful City Morris Men

Unreliable Biographies

 

 

ROBIN AITKEN
Robin is a "Local Yokel" having spent his early years in Upton upon Severn and Malvern, only recently returning from an extended "morris learning experience" in the urban wastes of the South East. He is still learning and may occasionally be seen dancing if the sun is shining or more often squeezing his small instrument.

RICHARD ALLEN
Our webmaster. He owns his own company ( www.malvernmicro.com ) but I can’t work out what he does. He has come back to the Morris after a break of a number of years. He is so devoted to the sound of bells that he wears a key fob to practice that rings like bells.

JOHN BARKER
John is the founder of the side, plays the button accordion for ourselves and Soft Option Appalachian side. He is our long term Treasurer (although we believe his partner does most of the work.)

ROBERT BARKER
(No relation to John above) He does something unmentionable to chickens and sheep dogs – not always at the same time. He also seems addicted to Open University courses.


DAVE BRAND
One of the newer members of the side. His dancing is developing nicely. Well done Dave (if you need a stair lift or wheelchair just contact him).


ALLAN CRAIG
Hails from the cold north, can't remember whether its Scotland or Northumberland, but where they talk funny. Used to be a teller of corny jokes when baggies business finished, but his source has dried up now (his sons have grown up).


JOHN DAVIES
John also dances with South Shrops MM and Jockey MM. At one point he was attempting to get in the Guinness Book of records by holding a large number of offices in different sides.


MARK FENTON
Mark is a “natural” dancer and picks up and remembers dances very easily consequently he is hated by all the rest of the side. At least he is good for a Jig when the rest of us are too knackered to go on.


RICHARD HANNAH
Richard is a member of Kempsey MM (the side that is dead but refuses to lie down) and is the dance organiser for Upton Folk Festival (well worth going to). He is trying to recapture his adolescence by driving an open topped Morgan.


DAVE HISLOP
Dave is the teacher of our rapper side and one of our musicians. He is ex-chairman of EFDSS and a singer of note (several notes actually). Now retired, he stays up half the night compiling DVD's of exemplary Rapper dancing so he can show us how bad we are.

 

IAN JAMES

Ian has recently moved into the area being a former Greensleeves man. We don’t yet know any of his guilty secrets to publish here but when we do this is where they’ll go. As well as a dancer Ian is a concertina player.

 

ROBIN KALINOWSKI

Robin is renowned for turning up late. He is so keen on the dance that he tore his Achilles tendon to avoid having to do a gig. History was made this year when we finally persuaded him to lead a dance.

 

TIM KELSEY

Tim is a Primary school teacher and our newest novice. He is picking up the dances very well and we believe this is because of the extra practice he gets as he Morris dances along the school corridors between lessons!!

 

STAN KILBY

On the current “sick list” Stan is the world’s foremost exponent of the Kilby school of dance which involves having both feet on the floor at all times while keeping in time with the music. I’ll say this for it - he’s never on the wrong foot.

 

BEN MOULE
Apart from dressing up in funny Morris clothes, Ben also dresses up in funny period (not sure from what period) costumes and acts out battles with cannons, pikes and the like! His new job is a trainee museum curator, so couldn’t be more apt and right up his street!!
 

ROBERT SLATER

If you want to scare your children get them to look at his website (www.magicwords.co.uk) he sings and spends whole evenings tuning his guitar. He is also employed by the KGB to get military secret out of children who live on UK forces bases in Germany.

 

ALISTAIR SMITH

Ali is a chef and comes from Bonnie Scotland. He is a walking (or dancing) encyclopaedia of aviation history and also very handy at rustling up a hot meal on camping weekends.

 

BILL SMITH

Bill plays, makes and repairs fiddles. He has danced Morris in various parts of the world notably Australia. He also seems to have an encyclopaedic knowledge of where to find “good ale”.

 

IAN VIGURS

Glyn’s brother (see below). Ian is a second generation dancer we dance “Steve’s dance” in memory of his father who died in kit in Stourport. Ian usually leads this dance/he is a very enthusiastic dancer.

 

MIKE WALTON

The third ex-Kempsey man (see Richard Hannah and Alex Brown). Mike is the only Morris Man I know who will stop dancing to watch a bus go by. His website marries his interests of folk music/dance and busses- well worth a visit.

( www.worcesterfolk.org.uk )He is also a musician.

 

ANDREW WATSON

Andrew joined the side in its first year and is still an active member of the Morris and Rapper sides at the age of *?@! A semi-retired farmer.  Andrew is renowned for being about ½ beat ahead of the music by everyone except himself.

 

GORDON WHITTAKER

Gordon has finally realised that he has to act his age so cut his ponytail off and bought a flashy car. Gordon is the quiet one in the side.

 

 

THE DIASPORA

 

There are various occasional members of the side. The club rule is that you cannot resign from it so once a FCMM always a FCMM.

 

KEITH BARKER

Unrelated to either of the Barkers above. Keith knows where all the best food deals are available and occasionally turns up on Boxing day.

 

JIM BARTLETT

Jim holds the world record for dancing 202 miles in a week from Orpington to Worcester. Now living in South Wales we usually see him at Bromyard FF.

 

ALEX BROWN

Alex developed a new tradition of the dance which involves climbing up a ladder and then falling off it. Consequently he was on the “sick list” for a while.  Another ex-Kempsey man  and still turns out for Hammersmith. One of his endearing qualities is that he can call a dance if someone tells him when it starts. Unfortunately he has moved away from the area now. We will miss his “bouncy” style of dancing which used to put us to shame!

 

DAVID CHAUNDY

Time is catching up with David and we see him rarely now. He plays pipe and tabor and his Morris history goes back at least 50 years. He once helped William Kimber get up after he fell off his bike coming up their drive.

 

PETE DAUNCEY

Pete used to be the town crier for Bromyard. As you would expect he was excellent at announcing the dances. Unfortunately he has moved away from the area, so we rarely see him these days.

 

MALCOLM HOPPER

Known as “Malcolm who?” it would be good to see you again Malcolm!!

 

BRIAN JOHNSON

Also known as “Josh”. He has always turned out for Bromyard Folk Festival (he lives 50 yards from the town spot). His dancing would improve if he also came to practice.

 

NICK OLIVER

Now dancing with Ilmington MM and often comes to ring meetings with us. We dance with Ilmington once a year and see him then also.

 

TONY ROBERTS

A retired policeman who now works for the ambulance service. What we want to know did the ambulance people know of his police history of totalling Land Rovers. He now claims to be allergic to Cheshire Cheese after eating too much at a Chester MM weekend.

 

NORMAN SHEFIELD

Another ex-policeman now retired. He seems to have lost contact with us.

 

GLYN VIGURS

Ian’s brother and Mark’s brother in law (see above). Glyn is like Mark in that he picks up and remembers dances far too easily so he is also hated by the side. Glyn is in charge of the defence of the nation (at least that’s what he tells me) but when it is safe, he returns to Worcester to show us all up.

 

JOHN WHITAKER

John is always “about to come back to FCMM” it would be good if it actually happened.

   

DISCLAIMER

 

NONE OF THE ABOVE MAY BE TRUE BUT NO NAMES HAVE BEEN CHANGED TO PROTECT THE INNOCENT BECAUSE GOD DOES THAT AS A MATTER OF ROUTINE.